Step behind the curtain and undress please...

Flatulence Helps Fight Disease. British scientists say a high-tech flatus test may be the solution for those tough-to-diagnose stomach bugs. While flatulence may be the stuff of jokes, the gas could provide the 'chemical fingerprints' to diagnose digestive infections. [Wired News]

Man! There are just too many places to go with this one, all of them wrong. If a doctor puts his nose to my ass and tells me to fart, I ain't gonna quit laughing for days.

More fart humor:

You ever notice there's really 3 kinds of farters in the world? The rippers, the floaters, and the stealth bombers.

The rippers are the people who stand up and do the "motorcycle" while flatulating. The floaters will pass the all intrusive SBD and then sit there and giggle about it. The stealth bombers are by far the most deadly. They flatulate and leave the room without even warning you to open a window.

Yet MORE fart humor:

We had a family friend who used to light a match after farting. Nights after eating chili made our house look like a rock concert.

 

Dante's hell, the Test...
The Dante's Inferno Test has banished you to the Seventh Level of Hell!
Here is how you matched up against all the levels:

Level	Score
Purgatory (Repenting Believers)	Very Low
Level 1 - Limbo (Virtuous Non-Believers)	Very Low
Level 2 (Lustful)	Very High
Level 3 (Gluttonous)	Very High
Level 4 (Prodigal and Avaricious)	Very High
Level 5 (Wrathful and Gloomy)	High
Level 6 - The City of Dis (Heretics)	Moderate
Level 7 (Violent)	Extreme
Level 8- the Malebolge (Fraudulent, Malicious, Panderers)	Very High
Level 9 - Cocytus (Treacherous)	Moderate

Take the Dante's Inferno Hell Test (Thanks, Amy!)

Well looky there. I scored a 7. Stupid test. Well I oughta come over there and knock that guys block off....I mean....uh....;)

 

 

Reason number 102...

Well, I think this pretty much explains why I won't live in a trailer park. Just another reason to add to the list.

Girl Brings Human Skulls For Show And Tell
Three human skulls that wound up in a mobile home park trash bin and became a 12-year-old girl's show-and-tell project belonged to a man who brought them home from Europe decades ago, authorities said Saturday. [NBC4 L.A]

 

Ouch!
Mountaineer cuts off his own arm with a pocket knife.. As reported in the Rocky Mountain News. Aron Ralston, after being trapped with his arm under a rock for five days, decided that if he did not get free he would die. Using his pocketknife, he amputated his arm below the elbow, put on a tourniquet and administered first- aid. He then rigged anchors and fixed a rope to rappel to the floor of Blue John Canyon. [kuro5hin.org] 

Number 5 for what???

Hmmm...evidently I'm number 5 in on Google for "Sex in Public Toilets". Probably closer to the top now that I've made this post.

I don't know whether to be offended or overjoyed.

 

Welcome to therapy...

One thing I have been wondering about...you ever notice how some people treat their blog like it's a form of psycho therapy? "I'm not blogging anymore. I don't feel I NEED it."

Um...excuse me? Did I miss something?

 

Can you say
Say you work for a teevee news outfit -- ABC's 20/20, for example -- and you've got a digital camera and you're taking some tourist shots around Camp Patriot. And then, for some reason, you decide to take a few shots of your dick, because ... well, who knows? And then say you lose your camera. And a certain naval officer finds it.

Also, the naval officer updates his blog from Kuwait.
[Ken Layne]

OMG! Hilarious! You have to go read the account of the soldier that found the camera. Just don't do it in front of your boss or he'll wonder what you're laughing about.